Saturday, July 24, 2010

Me right now.

Me right now.


Busy, busy, busy.

Forcr is coming up quick and uni goes back next week, also a million and one other things that MUST be done.

But I don't mind that.
It's been an interesting few weeks to say the least. Full of realisations about me. Most of them aren't very nice.

For instance:

Whether I like it or not, whether it is fair or not the state of my nest depends on me being invested in it. Which I haven't been for a long time.

I have screwed up worse then I was allowing myself to see.

I have not taken as much responsibility for things as I thought I had.

I am a mess. A total mess. And I don't know if I can fix myself up. But I don't know who to ask for help.

Not really nice things to find out but all the same I think I need to know them. Now all that remains is to find out where to go from here. How to fix myself.

So there you have it.
My world in a nutshell.


  1. Rach, I think you are being overly hard on yourself. The first step is always awareness.. and this you have. The next is action to correct that which you see as out of balance.
    Take these steps in the directions that you feel require your most immediate attention and move on from there.
    Remember that you are a spiritual being having a human experience and that there are no mistakes.

    love you

  2. You are NOT broken!!!! You are just where you NEED to be today in order for you to be where you should be tomorrow. Jen is right, the first step is always awareness. Trust in yourself and remember that only inaction fails to propel you towards your future. *hugs*


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